Mad Women

1984

When my wife, Margie, talks about my days in advertising she brags that I was a Mad Man. Truth is I was lucky enough to catch the tail end of the best years but because I’ve never been much of a drinker I missed most of the best after school activities.

In 1984 I took a job running the Shoppers Drug Mart account at a Toronto ad agency. With a budget of 10 million dollars to create and run television commercials it was a top tier assignment.

I had to worry about advertising strategy, keeping the client happy and making sure that the people at the agency were doing what they were supposed to do. It’s an incredibly stressful role but I had been doing it elsewhere. In even more stressful circumstances. Like the Cola Wars of 1981 when the Pepsi Challenge came to Canada and Coca-Cola was my client. 

Just before I started, the agency had developed, but not yet filmed, a new advertising campaign. Our clients loved the idea. Around the same time a new creative director arrived. Judy was a star of the Toronto creative scene. Her career had flat-lined but it was still a coup for the agency to attract her.  Client was impressed even though she hadn’t created the new campaign.   

The new ads were to use a celebrity presenter, Hollywood actress Selma Diamond. She played the crusty bailiff on a successful sitcom, Night Court. Client was a little star struck.

About 10 days before the first commercials were to be filmed Judy told me that we’d have to change the schedule. She was going on holiday. It wasn’t negotiable. Can you say prima donna?

Shouldn’t have been a problem. It’s easy to change the studio and people who do the filming.

But it’s not easy to change Hollywood actresses. Selma was not available another time. So I had a client that was delighted with their new, not yet filmed, advertising, a beloved creative director who would quit if we didn’t change the schedule and a big star who was unavailable. No soup for me.

We decided not to tell our clients about Judy’s threat. Instead we told them we had to  change the shooting schedule and Selma Diamond wasn’t available and we’d find someone else. Someone better.

Selma was attractive to our clients. She was a real star at the time. But losing her would not be a deal breaker especially if we got a better name. We told the client we’d have a replacement idea pronto and they’d be happy.

Now the problem was to find a good enough affordable star available on one weeks’ notice. We invited the casting directors in. We waited to start until noon so we could call the west coast to check for availabilities. Lists filled the wash off wall paper in our boardroom.

Six hours later, no replacement. The best names were too expensive or unavailable. We decided to break for dinner. Lots of anxiety in my life at that moment.

I was scheduled to dine with Margie near the University of Toronto where she was at a Mothers and Daughters conference which was perfect for Margie, who is a psychotherapist.

My posture was defeated as I explained the problem in terms of our dangling fortunes. She immediately said “what about Maude”.

At the conference they'd shown vignettes from the TV show Maude to demonstrate interplay between mothers and daughters. The actress who played Maude would be perfect to replace Selma Diamond. Neither of us knew who the actress was.

Back at the agency to resume our desperate search I suggested Maude. The casting people knew her. Judy thought it was a bad idea. Not because it came from me but because it wasn’t hers. But she agreed to contact Hollywood to check Maude out.

We hit the jackpot. Maude was played by Bea Arthur. She starred in Shoppers Drug Mart advertising from 1984 until she was making too much money on Golden Girls. Lucky for us when we called, Maude had just been cancelled. Bea was depressed and available at our budget. 

Soup for me.