Best Pizza Ever

1992

When the stretch limo pulled up to the nondescript pizza parlour in the other half of Ottawa, no place I’d ever be able to find again, I was skeptical that lunch would overcome my nagging anxiety. 

The people of Canada owned the limo but on this day it was outfitted for the exclusive use of Jean-Pierre Kingsley who at the time, spring 1992, was the CEO of Elections Canada. Kingsley had recommended the restaurant and offered the ride.

The pizza lunch my colleagues and I enjoyed for lunch that day was delicious. Tasty crust. Great toppings. Made you think about the optimal marriage of deep dish and thin crust. I usually am down on bureaucrats but Kingsley knew his pizza. 

But, awesome as the pizza was it paled in comparison to the uniqueness of the day. 

My team was in Ottawa to compete in two beauty contests that day. One before lunch and one after lunch. 

I was in the advertising agency business at the time and the beauty contests were actually separate new business pitches to Elections Canada tailored to win their advertising account leading up to the the 1993 election, the one that ended Kim Campbell's 4 months as Prime Minister. Beauty contest is a cynical way to describe the whimsy that often is the ad agency selection process. 

A win would have been huge for our small agency. 

We were up against Cossette Advertising which at the time was one of Canada's biggest agencies having ridden a rocket from its founding in Quebec City in 1974 by six well connected French Canadians. They had already won a lot of government contracts. Well connected begets more well connected and competitive advantage.

I was the CEO of Kert Advertising reporting to Norm Kert, the owner. Most of our billings came from one client, Shoppers Drug Mart, with the Bay supplying another dollop. 

Typically a new business pitch included three components. There would be some creative ideas. This might be ideas for TV, radio and print advertising. It was important to show edgy ideas that didn't make the client's palms sweat too much. Mostly they wanted to see things that would earn them the admiration of their contemporaries. 

There would also be a draft media plan showing how the advertising would be visible to the masses. It was important to demonstrate how the agency would be efficient, effective and careful while spending the client's money. We didn't mention all the wining and dining we had to suffer from media salespeople. 

The third segment would be strategy. This would combine some ideas for market research combined with a demonstration of business acumen. We wanted to show a lot of professional ability in this time slot. 

What was remarkable about this day, aside from the tasty pizza lunch, was that my agency was engaged to show creative and strategy ideas only. We were teamed with one specialized media buying service for the morning presentation and with a second specialized media buying agency in the afternoon. So in addition to competing against Cossette we were competing against ourselves since each of our presentations required different strategy and creative ideas. It was a very odd circumstance. Our creative team had be impressive in the earlier rounds, not so much our media folks, so Elections Canada asked if we'd pitch separately with the two media buying services they liked.

Cossette was doing a normal pitch; strategy, creative, media.

New business pitches are single warrior combat. Us against them. Euphoric victories or expensive devastating losses. The victors celebrate while the losers point fingers.  

Our two partners, MBS, Media Buying Services and HYPN, Harrison, Young, Pesonen and Newell were behemoths. They had many clients taking advantage of their superior buying power. 

MBS was run by Peter Swain who had more or less built his agency and was a sole owner. HYPN was shared equally by three owners. Tatu Pesonen, one of the founders, had died a few years back. Harrison, Young and Newell had superior acumen and excellent people skills. Harrison is still a friend.

Swain was cut throat. During the morning presentation with us he not so smoothly interjected that if the Elections Canada decision makers liked his team but not my team he could easily replace us. I think he was looking right at me when he offered up my scalp.

Well, well connected is as well connected does and Cossette was the victor in this beauty contest and was crowned Miss Elections Canada 1992.

My solace was a couple of very good pizza slices in the shadow of parliament hill or somewhere near there.